Silent but oh-so deadly

Yesterday evening, I returned home to the distinct smell of poop. And not human poop. Dog poop. The only question: Where?

Sean was already on the hunt for the source of the smell. By the time I joined in, he’d concluded that it must just be the potency of Dexter’s farts, or as my former colleague, Laura Houlihan, calls them: Garbage farts.

This went on for about an hour: The two of us, playing with the dogs, running around the house, and then suddenly stopping everything because there it was again! That POOP smell! I inspected each dog thoroughly (because as you know, Dexter rolled in poo recently), but Sean had given them both baths yesterday, so they smelled as wonderful as dogs can smell.

At one point, I accused Sean. I mean, it’s science: If the dogs didn’t poo in the house, or step in poo and bring it into the house, then the next likely culprit is Sean. I would be number four on that list for sure.

But, I was wrong (and Sean was miffed—how COULD I?!) and we continued to suffer in Stink Town USA, until FINALLY, things came to a head after a long wrestling match between Dexter and a stuffed penguin. Side note: Dexter won—poor penguin lost his head and wing…and stuffing, which Dexter happily wolfed down. Yes, we have a dog that eats stuffing. Yes, we feed him enough. Yes, he’s just weird like that.

Photo interlude:

Good dog, Dexter.

During battle. Poor penguin didn't stand a chance.

Dexter is victorious. And keeps a little stash of stuffing saved up for later.

Anyway, after I’d disposed of penguin’s remains and what stuffing I could get my hands on, we noticed Dexter hanging out near the door, which is right by the garbage can.

Sean: What is Dexter doing?

Mollie: He’s creeping over there because that’s where I threw penguin away.

Sean: Maybe he has to go to the bathroom.

Both: (moment of enlightenment)

You see, we are used to Daisy. She doesn’t alert people when she has to go—she either holds it, or doesn’t hold it. Simple as that. So when I took Dexter out to the yard, lo and behold he took off like a banshee to find a spot to poo. Turns out, he is trained to alert owners when nature calls—FASCINATING!

Mystery solved: Dexter was silently crop dusting our house the whole time.